Today’s top story:
Camper Luke One Step Closer to Achieving World Domination (at least on cardboard)

War is RISKy business. Early this morning Luke put the final nail in the coffin of Jaterrius’s armies. After being driven out of Africa, Jaterrius attempted a last ditch attack on Luke’s armies in southern Europe. Valiantly delaying the inevitable for a while, Jaterrius now takes his place along with Ethan and Ben as commanders of vanquished armies. Meanwhile, John is amassing troops in Indonesia, preparing to embark on a conquest of the entire continent of Asia. Were his invasion to be successful, the tides of the game could drastically change, but as it stands, Luke seems to be in control of the contest and will soon be in control of the world. More coming on this story later.
Other headlines from this week:
V-Con Theme Rumored to be Monopoly
Counselor Jakob Vejr Has Warm and Fuzzy Moments
Concert Announced, Dehydration Cancelled
Trash-Car Sighting Verified
Ninjas Ambush Optionals
McLean TV Plugged In, SSB Played
Wade Not Going to Turn into Zombie
Campers Reveal Themselves to be Supernatural Ping Pong Spirits
Campers Leave a Place Better Than When Found
Counselor Jakob Vejr Receives Touching Post on Warm and Fuzzy Board
“Will Never Swing Lanyard Again,” Camper Claims
Noodle Wielding Ghost Settles in Lobby During Community Time
Jacob and Ji-Won Told to Go to Bed